No matter how your pain originates you have choices to make which will determine its impact in your life. There is an old Zen saying;
“Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional”
But how many of us opt-out of suffering? Even the TV ads, news ads, magazine ads and our coworkers expect us to suffer and they will join in with us… “misery loves company” after all. Billion dollar businesses are supported each day by our choosing to knock out our suffering with drugs. Pain is an amazing motivator causing us to write songs about a broken heart, invent a product to solve a physical pain issue (hot pads) and it will guide us in our relationships.
We experience pain in one of two ways or the two ways combined;
Physical pain– a paper cut is an example. Sudden, pain which we deal with immediately and move on without much thought or emotional attachment
Emotional pain – a broken heart, disappointment, depression and other feelings that have no physical connection and are usually mentally centered
Combo Pain – either physical pain or emotional pain can trigger the other to “join-in”- for instance that paper cut …. if you added insulting thoughts like “how clumsy I am” to the mix, this would create even more pain than the cut gave you.
No one likes pain but personally I believe pain is our friend. Without pain we would get into some serious trouble, in fact I could go so far as to say pain keeps us alive and well.
Think about it.
Physical Pain – Why don’t you pick up the cookie sheet with your bare hands? Pain stops you. Either you did it by accident before, or you learned some other way that hot things hurt, and can cause serious damage to your body.
Emotional Pain – You might be shopping at a store and notice a teller getting yelled at by a customer. Emotional pain enters your body (Eckart Tolle calls this the Pain Body) as you recall a moment you’ve been publicly criticized. Pain motivates you to back away, maybe ever go to find a security guard for help. Pain awakened you to a potential problem, and got you to stop and perhaps go get help before going to the checkout stand at this time.
Just like with people who want to communicate something with you; you can run, you can hide, you can turn and hear them and you can engage and see what they are all about. Pain is just like a person who want’s to be your friend, a friend who will always look out for your best interests and it does this by alerting you to any and all danger that appears in your personal space. Stop running away from or ignoring this pain-friend because unlike with people you really can’t hide from pain, it will just get louder and more serious until you stop and notice.
So take a moment and stop when you feel pain calling to get your attention. Try making friends with your pain by sitting and hearing what message or gift it has for you. Follow the advice your pain-friend has to offer and see how much better you feel overall!
‘till next time,
Your Personal Space Coach©